AUBURN, AL – Don’t go to the loveliest village on the Plains for a taste of fruit punch.
“We don’t even have red Gatorade in this building,” Auburn center Cole Best told me in February.
That’s right, you won’t find red sports drink inside the Woltosz Football Performance Center at Auburn.
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Why? Because of the Iron Bowl, of course.
Seriously.
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Alabama’s colors being what they are — crimson and white — makes red sports drink contraband.
“It’s my first time having a real, true rivalry like that,” said Best, a transfer from South Florida. “To me, it just builds excitement. It’s really, really cool to me, and I can’t wait to experience my first Iron Bowl.”
This red restriction zone doesn’t stop at sports drinks, either.
“I challenge you, this side of the building, to find a red pen,” Auburn offensive line coach Tyler Hudanick told USA TODAY Sports. “Those all got thrown away.”
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An ‘Fe’ Auburn can’t shy away from Alabama
Welcome to Auburn football under first-year coach Alex Golesh.
Now, this might all sound a bit gimmicky, right? I mean, will all those months of writing in blue ink and drinking orange Gatorade matter when it comes to stopping Alabama on 4th-and-31?
No matter what color Gatorade the Tigers consume, they should be able to get off the field on 4th-and-31, right? Well, Hugh Freeze couldn’t muster a stop.
Maybe, that’s the point.
These past five years of Auburn football were so dreadful — let’s not mince words — we shouldn’t fault anyone in or around the program for throwing salt over their left shoulder, knocking on wood, rubbing a lucky rabbit’s foot, hunting for four-leaf clover, or, in the case of Golesh and his staff, ditching fruit punch and draining the place of red ink.
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You might think Auburn ought to set its goals smaller than Alabama.
Like, start by ending a two-game losing streak to Vanderbilt.
Or, don’t lose to opponents like New Mexico State or California, teams Freeze lost to within the first two years of his tenure.
But, spend any amount of time around Golesh, and you’ll hear one word more than any other.
Elite.
He says it on a loop, and he’s trying to make it Auburn’s standard.
“I do think there’s a difference between being good, great, and elite,” Golesh says.
Better yet, make it “Fe,” the two-letter mantra Golesh espouses.
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Fe just happens to be the periodic table symbol for iron, but, around Auburn football, it’s taken on a different meaning. Multiple meanings, in fact. One of those is: (Expletive) elite.
I shouldn’t have to spell it out. Remember, it’s “Fe.”
A team that’s “Fe” wouldn’t shy away from Alabama.
“It’s extremely important. It’s a must-win,” Hudanick said of the Iron Bowl. “It’s a dire deal, and I think you’ve got to make that important to your team all year round.
“We’ve had periods of the day that are called the Iron Bowl — whether it’s the start of the day or the finisher of the day, you’re creating a period where it’s time, just to think about: We’ve got to go finish, because we’re going to play them at the end of the year.”
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No fruit punch at Auburn. That’s Iron Bowl rivalry at work
This level of import on the Iron Bowl would seem natural if the Tigers had a born and bred Aubie coaching them, but Golesh is a native of Russia. He immigrated at age 7 and grew up in Brooklyn, New York, and later Ohio. He’s never coached a game at Jordan-Hare Stadium, and he admits he’s no smooth orator of Auburn history.
For history and culture lessons, he can consult wide receivers coach Kodi Burns, who played for Auburn, or running backs coach Larry Porter, who’s back after a stint as an assistant under Gus Malzahn.
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Malzahn, retired from coaching, moved back to Lee County. Golesh calls him “a huge resource.” With a 3-5 record in the Iron Bowl, Malzahn enjoyed more success against Nick Saban’s Alabama than most SEC peers.
History lessons aside, Golesh’s fire and intensity lends itself to rivalries.
Fortunately, Auburn’s fruit punch drought need not extend to other flavors. Chief rivals Alabama and Georgia both wear a shade of red.
It’s an undeniably tough draw of rivals. Auburn hasn’t beaten either since firing Malzahn. The Tigers have lost nine straight to Georgia and six in a row to Alabama.
If you could give Auburn stakeholders truth serum, I wonder how many would quietly admit they’d rather not face that one-two punch each season.
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Publicly, though, that’s not the message.
“I will give it to Georgia and Alabama… they have a very long history of being very successful in football,” Auburn athletic director John Cohen said.
“There’s one school in our league that has to play Georgia and Alabama,” Cohen added, “and I view that as the opportunity of a lifetime.”
Just so long as you’re not craving fruit punch.
Blake Toppmeyer is the USA TODAY Network’s senior national college football columnist. Email him at BToppmeyer@gannett.com and follow him on X @btoppmeyer.
This article originally appeared on USA TODAY: Auburn football, Alex Golesh’s red ban is all about Alabama
